Saturday, October 16, 2010

"I am the very model of a modern mad conservative"

(With halfhearted apologies to Gilbert and Sullivan)

I am the very model of a modern mad conservative
If you don't have the benjamins you've forfeited your right to live
I eschew any notion of social responsibility
And spend my weekends lamenting the government with bags of tea

He spends his weekends lamenting the government with bags of tea
He spends his weekends lamenting the government with bags of tea
He spends his weekends lamenting the government with bags of tea

Obama is a socialist but also he's an Islamist
That these are contradictory it doesn't matter in the least
He aims to grab America and tear it down with all his might
From years of sitting in the pews and hearing Jeremiah Wright

I will protect you from the sodomites and the pornographers
Unless the latter group sends large donations to our headquarters
And in my presence you need never fear attacks by terrorists
Except of course for those whose names are on our biggest donor lists

Except of course for those whose names are on our biggest donor lists
Except of course for those whose names are on our biggest donor lists
Except of course for those whose names are on our biggest donor lists

I will unite the Bachmannites the Palinesques and Limbaughnaughts
The Beckers and the Hannitights the Anglers and the Cheneybots
For imposition of my prejudice no reason I will give
I am the very model of a modern mad conservative

For imposition of his prejudice no reason he will give
He is the very model of a modern mad conservative

3 comments:

Elaine said...

This is fantastic! I was in the show many, many years ago. Original lyrics, of course.

matt said...

Thanks, Elaine. What part did you have in the show?

Elaine said...

I was in the chorus, dancing away. I had a ball, and can still do the little umbrella at the beach number we did, which my kids think is a total hoot "climbing over rocky mountains, skipping rivulets and foutains..."

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